Friday, March 31, 2006
Thursday, March 30, 2006
That Galactus Fanfic, Part 2
Meanwhile, at the Forman Household, Kitty and Bob are worried about Red
Kitty: He's been in that garage for days, Bob. That's not natural. I think he might be angry about something.
Bob: How could you tell? He's always angry. At least when I'm around.
Kitty: Yeah, what a coincidence...
Kitty does her weird laugh. Bob looks hurt. Kitty composes herself.
Kitty: I'm... sure it's a coincidence Bob. I really ought to go check on him.
Kitty waits for Bob to leave. He doesn't.
Kitty: So, Bob... see you later!
Bob: I'll be right here.
Kitty: Uh, Bob, I meant see you later after you leave and go back to your house.
Bob: No. I'm fine right here.
Red, from the garage: Go home, Bob!
Bob quickly leaves.
Kitty enters the garage. Red is sporting Reed Richards-like stubble, in my sad attempt at a homage to the original Galactus arc.
Kitty: Red, thanks for getting rid of Bob, but I'm worried about you. You spend all your time in the garage and oh my god who is that large bald man in a toga?
Red: Oh, yeah. This Uatu. Apparently he's some kind of intergalactic hall monitor or something. He's been telling me about some dumb ass named Galactus who wants to eat the planet. So we've been coming up with a way to get rid of him.
Kitty: Okay.
Uatu: Kitty Forman, do not be alarmed. Though I have take an oath of non interference, I can not sit idly by while Galactus threatens your planet. So I have come to your husband in search of help to save it.
Kitty: So, what you're saying is that my husband is the Earth's last hope?
Red: Yeah, isn't it the damnedest thing!
Kitty: Oh dear.
Red: What do you mean, oh dear?
Kitty: Well, uh, honey, not to sell you or this nice... Uatu short, but, well...
Kitty looks right at Uatu
Kitty: Couldn't you have found someone better? Like Robert Redford? I bet he could sort this Galactus person out.
Kitty beams, thinking of Redford. Red looks annoyed. Uatu shrugs.
Uatu: Your husband is a war hero.
Red: That's damn right!
Uatu: Also, he was the only person I could get on short notice.
Red: Don't make me put my foot up your ass, Uatu!
Uatu looks frightened.
Kitty: Please forgive my husband, Uatu. He just has a thing for his foot and people's asses and... I bet you already knew that. And yet our fate is in his hands.
Uatu: Yes. I have observed your husband. His angry outbursts belie his good heart and strong commitment to doing what is right.
Red: Yeah. I could kick Robert Redford's ass!
Uatu: I have observed the human Redford, and I have to say that I believe you would be overmatched. He is a god among men. And quite handsome.
Red: That's it! I'm not takin' crap from some giant bald fruit in my own garage! Get out! I'll go stop this Galactus dumb ass myself!
Uatu: But we have not yet completed the Ultimate nullifier! That is the only weapon capable of defeating the devourer of worlds!
Red: Well, Uatu, I've got an Ultimate nullifier for him. It's my foot up his ass!
Red storms off. Kitty looks at Uatu
Kitty: So, uh, would you like some cookies?
Uatu: I have observed that you often burn your cookies.
Kitty dirty looks him.
Kitty: Get out.
Will Red be able to put his foot up Galactus's ass? Will Bob find companionship in Uatu? Will Kitty stop burning her cookies? Oh yeah, and isn't Galactus looking for a herald? Some of these questions might be answered in the next installment of That Galactus Fanfic. When I get around to writing it. Maybe. Just trying to be realistic.
Kitty: He's been in that garage for days, Bob. That's not natural. I think he might be angry about something.
Bob: How could you tell? He's always angry. At least when I'm around.
Kitty: Yeah, what a coincidence...
Kitty does her weird laugh. Bob looks hurt. Kitty composes herself.
Kitty: I'm... sure it's a coincidence Bob. I really ought to go check on him.
Kitty waits for Bob to leave. He doesn't.
Kitty: So, Bob... see you later!
Bob: I'll be right here.
Kitty: Uh, Bob, I meant see you later after you leave and go back to your house.
Bob: No. I'm fine right here.
Red, from the garage: Go home, Bob!
Bob quickly leaves.
Kitty enters the garage. Red is sporting Reed Richards-like stubble, in my sad attempt at a homage to the original Galactus arc.
Kitty: Red, thanks for getting rid of Bob, but I'm worried about you. You spend all your time in the garage and oh my god who is that large bald man in a toga?
Red: Oh, yeah. This Uatu. Apparently he's some kind of intergalactic hall monitor or something. He's been telling me about some dumb ass named Galactus who wants to eat the planet. So we've been coming up with a way to get rid of him.
Kitty: Okay.
Uatu: Kitty Forman, do not be alarmed. Though I have take an oath of non interference, I can not sit idly by while Galactus threatens your planet. So I have come to your husband in search of help to save it.
Kitty: So, what you're saying is that my husband is the Earth's last hope?
Red: Yeah, isn't it the damnedest thing!
Kitty: Oh dear.
Red: What do you mean, oh dear?
Kitty: Well, uh, honey, not to sell you or this nice... Uatu short, but, well...
Kitty looks right at Uatu
Kitty: Couldn't you have found someone better? Like Robert Redford? I bet he could sort this Galactus person out.
Kitty beams, thinking of Redford. Red looks annoyed. Uatu shrugs.
Uatu: Your husband is a war hero.
Red: That's damn right!
Uatu: Also, he was the only person I could get on short notice.
Red: Don't make me put my foot up your ass, Uatu!
Uatu looks frightened.
Kitty: Please forgive my husband, Uatu. He just has a thing for his foot and people's asses and... I bet you already knew that. And yet our fate is in his hands.
Uatu: Yes. I have observed your husband. His angry outbursts belie his good heart and strong commitment to doing what is right.
Red: Yeah. I could kick Robert Redford's ass!
Uatu: I have observed the human Redford, and I have to say that I believe you would be overmatched. He is a god among men. And quite handsome.
Red: That's it! I'm not takin' crap from some giant bald fruit in my own garage! Get out! I'll go stop this Galactus dumb ass myself!
Uatu: But we have not yet completed the Ultimate nullifier! That is the only weapon capable of defeating the devourer of worlds!
Red: Well, Uatu, I've got an Ultimate nullifier for him. It's my foot up his ass!
Red storms off. Kitty looks at Uatu
Kitty: So, uh, would you like some cookies?
Uatu: I have observed that you often burn your cookies.
Kitty dirty looks him.
Kitty: Get out.
Will Red be able to put his foot up Galactus's ass? Will Bob find companionship in Uatu? Will Kitty stop burning her cookies? Oh yeah, and isn't Galactus looking for a herald? Some of these questions might be answered in the next installment of That Galactus Fanfic. When I get around to writing it. Maybe. Just trying to be realistic.
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Humorously Ridiculous but Endearingly Cool Images in Superhero Comics Face Off #1!
Today, it's the Thing's incognito clothing vs. the Atom's tiny chair.
In the Thing's incognito clothing corner, we have Ben Grimm, tragic man-monster, putting on a hat and a trench coat in a sad attempt to go out in public and not be recognized as the Thing. One of the things I liked about the FF movie (and it was barely things) was that they had Ben show up outside his apartment to talk to his wife in a trenchcoat and hat. I am a nerd. It's a wonderful image. I really want it immortalized in plastic, but I've only been able to find it for what I consider to be exorbinant sums for an action figure. Like $30. Mind you, if I had an exorbinant sum and was in a really impulsive mood... Which is what I call pay day. That's one of the few reasons it's good I'm unemployed.
So, the Thing's trenchcoat ensemble is a wonderful image. But it is as wonderful an image as the Atom in a tiny chair at Justice League meetings? I'm not sure. I mean, look at these random panels of the Atom hanging out in his tiny chair with the rest of the JLA. Isn't that awesome in some many ways you can't name 'em all it's so awesome? I submit that it is. I just love that Ray Palmer, a brilliant scientist, is hanging out with a bunch of demi gods, the greatest champions of his generation, on the moon (or in the Hall of Justice or wherever the JLA happens to be hanging out) in a tiny chair. That's beautiful.
That said, when it comes down to a contest between these two titanic images... neither wins. This one I found when googling for images of the Thing in his trenchcoat beats them both. It wasn't even involved in the discussion, and yet it still wins. I'm sorry. Facts is facts.
In the Thing's incognito clothing corner, we have Ben Grimm, tragic man-monster, putting on a hat and a trench coat in a sad attempt to go out in public and not be recognized as the Thing. One of the things I liked about the FF movie (and it was barely things) was that they had Ben show up outside his apartment to talk to his wife in a trenchcoat and hat. I am a nerd. It's a wonderful image. I really want it immortalized in plastic, but I've only been able to find it for what I consider to be exorbinant sums for an action figure. Like $30. Mind you, if I had an exorbinant sum and was in a really impulsive mood... Which is what I call pay day. That's one of the few reasons it's good I'm unemployed.
So, the Thing's trenchcoat ensemble is a wonderful image. But it is as wonderful an image as the Atom in a tiny chair at Justice League meetings? I'm not sure. I mean, look at these random panels of the Atom hanging out in his tiny chair with the rest of the JLA. Isn't that awesome in some many ways you can't name 'em all it's so awesome? I submit that it is. I just love that Ray Palmer, a brilliant scientist, is hanging out with a bunch of demi gods, the greatest champions of his generation, on the moon (or in the Hall of Justice or wherever the JLA happens to be hanging out) in a tiny chair. That's beautiful.
That said, when it comes down to a contest between these two titanic images... neither wins. This one I found when googling for images of the Thing in his trenchcoat beats them both. It wasn't even involved in the discussion, and yet it still wins. I'm sorry. Facts is facts.
Monday, March 27, 2006
Sunday, March 26, 2006
The Greatest Achievement in the History of Man, or at least the greatest Thing team-up comics I've ever read (that may be the same thing)
So, here's some comics I have no snark for; Essential Marvel Two-In-One. I've only read about 1/25th or so of the fat stack of black and white reprints contained within this mighty tome, but if the rest of it holds up, then it's going to be my favorite Essential volume ever. Yeah, I like it more than any of the Claremont and friends X-Men, Lee-Kirby FF, Lee-Ditko Spider-Man or Dr. Strange, and maybe even the Gerber Howard the Duck.
See, I'm not sure, because Steve Gerber's writing is the reason I'm loving these stories so far. The man has a great absurdist/sarcastic sense of humor, which I love, but he can also pace a story like no one's business, and even provide some pathos and social commentary (as evidenced in the ending of his Thing-Man Thing team up in MTIO #1). He just knows how to write the kind of comics that make me love this medium. Well, he did in the '70s. I haven't read Hard Time yet, but I wager he still does. Anyway, his 70s Marvel work strikes the right balance for me in superhero comics, for me; not taking things too seriously, but not outright mocking the genre, either. Len Wein, who I've never been a fan of, really, shouldn't be overlooked either, as he provides some fun, rollicking scripts himself that strike that same balance. But Gerber's stuff has really knocked my socks off. So much so that I had to use that phrase for the first time in my life.
The art has also been stellar. Jim Starlin, another creator I've never had much time for, provides some nice pencils, but he's followed by a real show stealer, Gil Kane. Both guys do great rednitions of the ol' Benjy. I'm not sure if this was a mandate, but I really like how expressive they make his eyes. It adds to the humor of the stories. I'm sure that this is neither man's best work, but it is damn fine comic book storytelling that captures the bombast and dymanism of Marvel's finest quite well. Having Joe Sinnot on inks probably helps in that regard.
And hey, let's not forget who the star is. Probably my favorite Marvel character ever, the bashful, blue eyed idol o'millions himself. Gerber and Wein both nail his characterization perfectly. He's grouchy, occasionally petulant, and self pitying, but deep down he's got a big heart, and, y'know, he's really funny. He also play well in to the tone of the stories; he can recognize the absurdity of the situations he's in, but he still goes with it. I like that in a superhero. It's part of what made Spider-Man such a great character.
So, if you buy only one voluminous book of Bronze Age Marvel reprints, make it Essential Marvel Two In One. You'll be glad you did. Or it's clobberin' time. For you. Because you're a bad person. I think. I'll be lead to believe that if you don't like at least the Gerber stuff. You wouldn't want that, would you?
See, I'm not sure, because Steve Gerber's writing is the reason I'm loving these stories so far. The man has a great absurdist/sarcastic sense of humor, which I love, but he can also pace a story like no one's business, and even provide some pathos and social commentary (as evidenced in the ending of his Thing-Man Thing team up in MTIO #1). He just knows how to write the kind of comics that make me love this medium. Well, he did in the '70s. I haven't read Hard Time yet, but I wager he still does. Anyway, his 70s Marvel work strikes the right balance for me in superhero comics, for me; not taking things too seriously, but not outright mocking the genre, either. Len Wein, who I've never been a fan of, really, shouldn't be overlooked either, as he provides some fun, rollicking scripts himself that strike that same balance. But Gerber's stuff has really knocked my socks off. So much so that I had to use that phrase for the first time in my life.
The art has also been stellar. Jim Starlin, another creator I've never had much time for, provides some nice pencils, but he's followed by a real show stealer, Gil Kane. Both guys do great rednitions of the ol' Benjy. I'm not sure if this was a mandate, but I really like how expressive they make his eyes. It adds to the humor of the stories. I'm sure that this is neither man's best work, but it is damn fine comic book storytelling that captures the bombast and dymanism of Marvel's finest quite well. Having Joe Sinnot on inks probably helps in that regard.
And hey, let's not forget who the star is. Probably my favorite Marvel character ever, the bashful, blue eyed idol o'millions himself. Gerber and Wein both nail his characterization perfectly. He's grouchy, occasionally petulant, and self pitying, but deep down he's got a big heart, and, y'know, he's really funny. He also play well in to the tone of the stories; he can recognize the absurdity of the situations he's in, but he still goes with it. I like that in a superhero. It's part of what made Spider-Man such a great character.
So, if you buy only one voluminous book of Bronze Age Marvel reprints, make it Essential Marvel Two In One. You'll be glad you did. Or it's clobberin' time. For you. Because you're a bad person. I think. I'll be lead to believe that if you don't like at least the Gerber stuff. You wouldn't want that, would you?
Saturday, March 25, 2006
Because Ed Cunard said he'd read it; That Galactus Fanfic (Pt. 1)
He did. So here it is, Ed. I hope that wasn't sarcasm.
It's noon in Eric Forman's basement, and the gang is wasting away another boring day.
Hyde: Okay. I think we have officially done everything we possibly could down here to stave off boredom, so I say we just drink some of that Kool Aid and end it all.
Kelso: I don't like Kool Aid.
Everyone rolls their eyes at him. He has no clue why.
Fez: You know, Donna and Jackie could make out. That is something different.
Donna and Jackie in unison: Pervert!
Fez: Hey, I am just trying to help here. Don't shoot the messenger!
Eric: Y'know, girls, I think Fez has a point...
Jackie: Shut up, Eric! You guys are all creeps and Donna and I would rather be at the Mall clothes shopping than be in this musty old basement!
Donna and Jackie get up to leave.
Eric: Hey, Donna... you're really going to the mall with Jackie? I mean... it's Jackie. And the Mall. You'll be at the mall with Jackie.
Jackie flashes Eric a dirty look. Eric ignores her. Kelso still has no idea what's going on.
Donna: Yeah, well, I never thought it would come to this, but here we are.
Donna and Eric leave. Kelso picks up a Fantastic Four comic from Forman's coffee table in front of the TV.
Kelso: Man, I wish things were more like comics. I bet the Fantastic Four are never bored. I mean, look at the Human Torch there. He can set himself on fire! I bet that's awesome.
Hyde: Kelso, man, so can you.
Kelso: Oh yeah.
Forman: Yeah, well, the Fantastic Four don't freeload in their friend's basement. Unlike some people.
Kelso: Yeah, well, maybe that's because the Fantastic Four don't have any lame friends!
Forman: Well, I always thought the Inhumans were kind of dorky. I mean, Black Bolt wears that tuning fork on his head...
Hyde: Yeah, I'm already bored with this, and I thought of something we can do that never gets old. (Hyde pulls out a bag of pot)
Hyde: So, flame on!
Switch to the Circle. Everyone's high and sitting in a circle, for anyone conceivably reading this who isn't familiar with That 70s Show.
Kelso: Wait, I thought I was the Human Torch.
Fez: I feel like the Invisible Girl.
Everyone completely ignores him.
Eric: Well, I am so Mr. Fantastic. And not just because I'm limber.
Everyone looks at him funny.
Eric: Ask Donna!
Hyde: Yeah, uh, no.
Fez: I'd like to be the Invisble Girl. I could touch myself and no one could see me.
Everyone looks at Fez funny.
Eric: And we wondered why people send us letters asking us why we don't get rid of you.
Everyone looks at Eric funny.
Eric: See, there was this old Fantastic Four story where they answered letters in the comic, and there was this one letter where someone asked why they keep the Invisible Girl around...
Hyde: Eric, I don't care where this story is going, it's going to end with me calling you a nerd.
Eric: A limber nerd?
Hyde: No. Just a nerd.
Kelso: Hey, I have an idea!
Later on, the guys are at the water tower with the pot leaf on it.
Kelso: I don't know why I didn't think of coming up here after a circle before.
Eric: Maybe because you've never thought in a circle before.
Hyde: Nah, Eric, man, that isn't fair. Kelso does a lot of thinking in the circle. Remember when he came up with that idea for a rocket car?
Eric: Oh right. The car with the rocket strapped on it.
Kelso: That so would have worked if I had more tape.
Eric: So, I just had a thought. If I'm Mr. Fantastic, then Dr. Doom has to be...
Hyde: Red, man. Red is totally Dr. Doom.
Cut to scene with Red dressed as Doom and Eric as Reed. They are in Doom's castle.
Red/Doom: Cure you, dumb ass! You ruined Red's life! Now Red must crush you!
Eric/Reed: How? By being a dashing, brilliant thorn in your side?
Red: No, by being a dumb ass! You screwed up the calculations for my lab experiment, causing me to scar my face horribly!
Eric: It was close enough!
Red: See, that's your problem! You always half do things! Close enough isn't good enough! Back in my day, we used to work hard...
Eric: Wait, I thought you were Dr. Doom, not Red.
Red: Hey, it's your interlude, dumb ass.
Back to the water tower
Kelso: Whoa. I must be really messed up, but I think I see a giant purple dude with a weird helmet off in the distance.
Hyde: Well, we all smoked the same stash, so that might explain why I'm seeing it too.
Fez: I don't see anything.
Hyde: That's because you're reading a Hustler.
Fez: That is beside the point.
Eric: Guys, this is crazy, but I think that's...
Galactus, hovering above the water tower, enters the scene.
Galactus: I AM GALACTUS, DEVOURER OF WORLDS! AND I HAVE COME IN SEARCH OF A HERALD!
Hyde: Man, what was in that stash?
To be continued! Maybe Right Now! But probably not.
It's noon in Eric Forman's basement, and the gang is wasting away another boring day.
Hyde: Okay. I think we have officially done everything we possibly could down here to stave off boredom, so I say we just drink some of that Kool Aid and end it all.
Kelso: I don't like Kool Aid.
Everyone rolls their eyes at him. He has no clue why.
Fez: You know, Donna and Jackie could make out. That is something different.
Donna and Jackie in unison: Pervert!
Fez: Hey, I am just trying to help here. Don't shoot the messenger!
Eric: Y'know, girls, I think Fez has a point...
Jackie: Shut up, Eric! You guys are all creeps and Donna and I would rather be at the Mall clothes shopping than be in this musty old basement!
Donna and Jackie get up to leave.
Eric: Hey, Donna... you're really going to the mall with Jackie? I mean... it's Jackie. And the Mall. You'll be at the mall with Jackie.
Jackie flashes Eric a dirty look. Eric ignores her. Kelso still has no idea what's going on.
Donna: Yeah, well, I never thought it would come to this, but here we are.
Donna and Eric leave. Kelso picks up a Fantastic Four comic from Forman's coffee table in front of the TV.
Kelso: Man, I wish things were more like comics. I bet the Fantastic Four are never bored. I mean, look at the Human Torch there. He can set himself on fire! I bet that's awesome.
Hyde: Kelso, man, so can you.
Kelso: Oh yeah.
Forman: Yeah, well, the Fantastic Four don't freeload in their friend's basement. Unlike some people.
Kelso: Yeah, well, maybe that's because the Fantastic Four don't have any lame friends!
Forman: Well, I always thought the Inhumans were kind of dorky. I mean, Black Bolt wears that tuning fork on his head...
Hyde: Yeah, I'm already bored with this, and I thought of something we can do that never gets old. (Hyde pulls out a bag of pot)
Hyde: So, flame on!
Switch to the Circle. Everyone's high and sitting in a circle, for anyone conceivably reading this who isn't familiar with That 70s Show.
Kelso: Wait, I thought I was the Human Torch.
Fez: I feel like the Invisible Girl.
Everyone completely ignores him.
Eric: Well, I am so Mr. Fantastic. And not just because I'm limber.
Everyone looks at him funny.
Eric: Ask Donna!
Hyde: Yeah, uh, no.
Fez: I'd like to be the Invisble Girl. I could touch myself and no one could see me.
Everyone looks at Fez funny.
Eric: And we wondered why people send us letters asking us why we don't get rid of you.
Everyone looks at Eric funny.
Eric: See, there was this old Fantastic Four story where they answered letters in the comic, and there was this one letter where someone asked why they keep the Invisible Girl around...
Hyde: Eric, I don't care where this story is going, it's going to end with me calling you a nerd.
Eric: A limber nerd?
Hyde: No. Just a nerd.
Kelso: Hey, I have an idea!
Later on, the guys are at the water tower with the pot leaf on it.
Kelso: I don't know why I didn't think of coming up here after a circle before.
Eric: Maybe because you've never thought in a circle before.
Hyde: Nah, Eric, man, that isn't fair. Kelso does a lot of thinking in the circle. Remember when he came up with that idea for a rocket car?
Eric: Oh right. The car with the rocket strapped on it.
Kelso: That so would have worked if I had more tape.
Eric: So, I just had a thought. If I'm Mr. Fantastic, then Dr. Doom has to be...
Hyde: Red, man. Red is totally Dr. Doom.
Cut to scene with Red dressed as Doom and Eric as Reed. They are in Doom's castle.
Red/Doom: Cure you, dumb ass! You ruined Red's life! Now Red must crush you!
Eric/Reed: How? By being a dashing, brilliant thorn in your side?
Red: No, by being a dumb ass! You screwed up the calculations for my lab experiment, causing me to scar my face horribly!
Eric: It was close enough!
Red: See, that's your problem! You always half do things! Close enough isn't good enough! Back in my day, we used to work hard...
Eric: Wait, I thought you were Dr. Doom, not Red.
Red: Hey, it's your interlude, dumb ass.
Back to the water tower
Kelso: Whoa. I must be really messed up, but I think I see a giant purple dude with a weird helmet off in the distance.
Hyde: Well, we all smoked the same stash, so that might explain why I'm seeing it too.
Fez: I don't see anything.
Hyde: That's because you're reading a Hustler.
Fez: That is beside the point.
Eric: Guys, this is crazy, but I think that's...
Galactus, hovering above the water tower, enters the scene.
Galactus: I AM GALACTUS, DEVOURER OF WORLDS! AND I HAVE COME IN SEARCH OF A HERALD!
Hyde: Man, what was in that stash?
To be continued! Maybe Right Now! But probably not.
Friday, March 24, 2006
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Brian Catch Up Game!
Here's a way to get me caught up at Snark Free Waters! I will start a 20-day game!
NAME THAT IRON MAN ARTIST!
Since Jack Kirby drew the first Iron Man strip, there have been twenty pencillers to draw Iron Man between then and when Denny O'Neil took over the book with issue #160.
I will post a panel a day from each of the artists. You all just have to identify the artists!
Yay!
NAME THAT IRON MAN ARTIST!
Since Jack Kirby drew the first Iron Man strip, there have been twenty pencillers to draw Iron Man between then and when Denny O'Neil took over the book with issue #160.
I will post a panel a day from each of the artists. You all just have to identify the artists!
Yay!
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Top Five Firestorm Covers
In the height of laziness, I am just copying something I posted in reply to a post by Mike Sterling at Progressive Ruin.
So, with no further ado, are my top five favorite Firestorm covers!!
5. Firestorm (current) #18

That's a creepy image, no?
4. Firestorm (first series) #2

Always fun to see Superman be a jerk on a comic book cover
3. Firestorm (second series) #77

I always just remember this cover being so striking. The kiss looks so WEIRD!
2. Firestorm (second) #4

It's the JLA attacking Firestorm while he's with Killer Frost! Pat Broderick could occasionally rule!
1. Firestorm (second) #50

Denys Cowan and Firestorm are not two things I would put together in my mind, but darnit, it works!
Feel free to share your favorite Firestorm covers!
So, with no further ado, are my top five favorite Firestorm covers!!
5. Firestorm (current) #18

That's a creepy image, no?
4. Firestorm (first series) #2

Always fun to see Superman be a jerk on a comic book cover
3. Firestorm (second series) #77

I always just remember this cover being so striking. The kiss looks so WEIRD!
2. Firestorm (second) #4

It's the JLA attacking Firestorm while he's with Killer Frost! Pat Broderick could occasionally rule!
1. Firestorm (second) #50

Denys Cowan and Firestorm are not two things I would put together in my mind, but darnit, it works!
Feel free to share your favorite Firestorm covers!
Monday, March 20, 2006
3/20 Monday Challenge!
Let's say you are a new comic book company - come up with a term other than superheroes to describe your heroes (and one that has not already been used)!!
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Nagging Thoughts for 3/19
What's Black Knight up to nowadays?
How about Sersi?
That story where they went into the past, did that explain why Black Knight and Sersi are no longer an item?
Wasn't it kinda weird that Black Knight, in Avengers, was all "heroes sometimes have to kill," but when he was in Ultraforce, he was all, "heroes don't kill"?
How about Sersi?
That story where they went into the past, did that explain why Black Knight and Sersi are no longer an item?
Wasn't it kinda weird that Black Knight, in Avengers, was all "heroes sometimes have to kill," but when he was in Ultraforce, he was all, "heroes don't kill"?
Saturday, March 18, 2006
Who Is It? for 3/18
You know the drill...who is it, and what number clue gave it away!
1. This character has super strength.
2. This character debuted in the 1993 Marvel Annuals.
3. This character was born outside the United States.
4. This character is Irish.
5. This character debuted in the Guardians of the Galaxy Annual.
Who is it?
1. This character has super strength.
2. This character debuted in the 1993 Marvel Annuals.
3. This character was born outside the United States.
4. This character is Irish.
5. This character debuted in the Guardians of the Galaxy Annual.
Who is it?
Friday, March 17, 2006
Since Blogger Is Too Busy - Comic Book Urban Legends Revealed #42
This is the forty-second in a series of examinations of comic book urban legends and whether they are true or false. Click here for an archive of the previous forty-one.
Let's begin!
COMIC URBAN LEGEND: Gerry Conway did not intend to include the "snap" in the death of Gwen Stacy
STATUS: False
One of the most controversial issues in comic book history was Amazing Spider-Man #121, which featured the death of Peter Parker's girlfriend, Gwen Stacy.

One of the most controversial aspects of the comic was HOW Gwen died. As seen in the following panel, there was a tiny snap when Spider-Man attempts to snare her after she has been tossed off a bridge by the Green Goblin.

It is not clear in the comic whether she was actually killed by the snap to hear neck or shock from falling. In fact, the Green Goblin actually argues that it WASN'T the snap that did her in, yelling to Spider-Man, "Romantic idiot! She was dead before your webbing reached her! A fall from that height would kill anyone—before they struck the ground!"
In fact, in a bizarre event rarely seen in comic of the day, Marvel took the letter column of #125 to specifically address the death of Gwen Stacy (also, to defend Stan Lee and Gerry Conway). Part of the piece was, in a way, a comic book autopsy. The column reads,
In fact, in some reprints of the story, the little "snap" noise has been excised. Stan Lee (in Comic Buyers Guide #1277) even expressed some unease with the idea of her neck snapping, "I wasn't aware of that. To me, that's a little too - I don't think we have to know her neck snapped, you know what I mean?"
Therefore, perhaps BECAUSE of this unease, for awhile, different creators involved with the issue, from artist Gil Kane to letterer Artie Simek even to Art Director, John Romita, were rumored to have added the little "snap" sound effect.
However, at the end of the day, Gerry Conways admits that it was part of his initial story idea.
In Tom DeFalco's book of interviews, Comics Creators on Spider-Man, Gerry Conway speaks of including the snap, and how "It's one of a very few inspired moments in my career when my subconscious mind made a choice that meant so much more than my conscious mind ever intended."
So, if you want to blame, or praise, someone for the snap, blame/praise Gerry Conway.
(Thanks to Peter Sanderson for the Conway quote, Al Sjoerdsma for the Lee quote and Arnold T. Blumberg for the quote from #125)
COMIC URBAN LEGEND: The woman who was the titular basis for Kitty Pryde has since changed her name due to unwanted comic book fan attention.
STATUS: True
Kitty Pryde made her debut in Uncanny X-Men #129, in late 1979. Her co-creator, John Byrne, has never hid the fact that her name was based upon a classmate of his at art school.

But what's interesting is what happened to the "real" Kitty Pryde AFTER the X-Men Kitty Pryde was introduced.
In a story from the Calgary Sun by Louis B. Hobson (courtesy of The Cat Box, which is now twice in one week that I have cited The Cat Box...freaky)
It all happened back in 1973 when she was a student at the Alberta College of Art in Calgary. One of her classmates was John Byrne who would go on to become one of the more prolific writer/artists for Marvel Comics.
Ulimately, in the early 90s, in an attempt to regain her anonymity, Pryde began going by the name K.D. Pryde.
I will save you any horrible reference to her wanting to sometimes be able to walk through walls to get away from the attention.
COMIC URBAN LEGEND: Apocalypse was originally going to be the Owl.
STATUS: True
In the early issue of X-Factor, writer Bob Layton introduced a number of new villains, starting with #2 and Tower...

then Frenzy in #4...

leading to the revelation that the two were in a team, The Alliance of Evil, along with two other members, Timeshadow and Stinger.

At the end of the issue, we meet their mystery "master," who, although shrouded in shadows, is clearly a big fella.
In the next issue, we learn that the villain is Apocalypse, who would go on to become a significant X-Men villain (currently fighting the X-Men in their comic as you read this).

However, the mystery "master" was NOT meant to be Apocaylpse and that last page was not initially in the comic. No, it was going to be former Daredevil villain, the OWL!

You see, in issue #6, Louise Simonson took over the writing chores on X-Factor, and she preffered to have the mystery villain be a NEW villain to add to the mutant mythos, so Layton, on the way out, was asked to have it changed, and he, being a sporting soul, did so.
Imagine The Age of Owl!!! That would have been awesome!!
(I checked with Layton for confirmation of the story, and he confirmed it).
Well, that's it for this week, thanks for stopping by!
Feel free to drop off any urban legends you'd like to see featured!!
Let's begin!
COMIC URBAN LEGEND: Gerry Conway did not intend to include the "snap" in the death of Gwen Stacy
STATUS: False
One of the most controversial issues in comic book history was Amazing Spider-Man #121, which featured the death of Peter Parker's girlfriend, Gwen Stacy.

One of the most controversial aspects of the comic was HOW Gwen died. As seen in the following panel, there was a tiny snap when Spider-Man attempts to snare her after she has been tossed off a bridge by the Green Goblin.

It is not clear in the comic whether she was actually killed by the snap to hear neck or shock from falling. In fact, the Green Goblin actually argues that it WASN'T the snap that did her in, yelling to Spider-Man, "Romantic idiot! She was dead before your webbing reached her! A fall from that height would kill anyone—before they struck the ground!"
In fact, in a bizarre event rarely seen in comic of the day, Marvel took the letter column of #125 to specifically address the death of Gwen Stacy (also, to defend Stan Lee and Gerry Conway). Part of the piece was, in a way, a comic book autopsy. The column reads,
it saddens us to have to say that the whiplash effect she underwent when Spidey's webbing stopped her so suddenly was, in fact, what killed her. In short, it was impossible for Peter to save her. He couldn't have swung down in time; the action he did take resulted in her death; if he had done nothing, she still would certainly have perished. There was no way out.However, the snapping action is different than literally having her neck snap.
In fact, in some reprints of the story, the little "snap" noise has been excised. Stan Lee (in Comic Buyers Guide #1277) even expressed some unease with the idea of her neck snapping, "I wasn't aware of that. To me, that's a little too - I don't think we have to know her neck snapped, you know what I mean?"
Therefore, perhaps BECAUSE of this unease, for awhile, different creators involved with the issue, from artist Gil Kane to letterer Artie Simek even to Art Director, John Romita, were rumored to have added the little "snap" sound effect.
However, at the end of the day, Gerry Conways admits that it was part of his initial story idea.
In Tom DeFalco's book of interviews, Comics Creators on Spider-Man, Gerry Conway speaks of including the snap, and how "It's one of a very few inspired moments in my career when my subconscious mind made a choice that meant so much more than my conscious mind ever intended."
So, if you want to blame, or praise, someone for the snap, blame/praise Gerry Conway.
(Thanks to Peter Sanderson for the Conway quote, Al Sjoerdsma for the Lee quote and Arnold T. Blumberg for the quote from #125)
COMIC URBAN LEGEND: The woman who was the titular basis for Kitty Pryde has since changed her name due to unwanted comic book fan attention.
STATUS: True
Kitty Pryde made her debut in Uncanny X-Men #129, in late 1979. Her co-creator, John Byrne, has never hid the fact that her name was based upon a classmate of his at art school.

But what's interesting is what happened to the "real" Kitty Pryde AFTER the X-Men Kitty Pryde was introduced.
In a story from the Calgary Sun by Louis B. Hobson (courtesy of The Cat Box, which is now twice in one week that I have cited The Cat Box...freaky)
It all happened back in 1973 when she was a student at the Alberta College of Art in Calgary. One of her classmates was John Byrne who would go on to become one of the more prolific writer/artists for Marvel Comics.
“I first noticed John in our (still-life) classes. While the rest of us were drawing the nudes, John would be making sketches of Superman and Spiderman. One day he told me he loved my name and promised when he became famous at Marvel Comics, he’d name his first character after me.” Pryde thought nothing of the compliment.
In 1980 when when she was living and working in Toronto, Pryde received a package in the mail. It contained one page of Byrne’s original sketches for his Kitty Pryde character plus a signed copy of the comic book it eventually became. He’d signed it: “To Kitty, the real one. Thanks for the use of the name.” The X-Men comics became one of Marvel’s best sellers.
Kitty eventually morphed into an action figure like so many of her mutant friends. “Kitty started out as a young girl with superhuman powers. By the time they created her action figure, she’d become a major chick. She may bear my name, but she wasn’t modelled after me. I only wish I had knockers like that,” jokes Pryde.

Ulimately, in the early 90s, in an attempt to regain her anonymity, Pryde began going by the name K.D. Pryde.
I will save you any horrible reference to her wanting to sometimes be able to walk through walls to get away from the attention.
COMIC URBAN LEGEND: Apocalypse was originally going to be the Owl.
STATUS: True
In the early issue of X-Factor, writer Bob Layton introduced a number of new villains, starting with #2 and Tower...

then Frenzy in #4...

leading to the revelation that the two were in a team, The Alliance of Evil, along with two other members, Timeshadow and Stinger.

At the end of the issue, we meet their mystery "master," who, although shrouded in shadows, is clearly a big fella.
In the next issue, we learn that the villain is Apocalypse, who would go on to become a significant X-Men villain (currently fighting the X-Men in their comic as you read this).

However, the mystery "master" was NOT meant to be Apocaylpse and that last page was not initially in the comic. No, it was going to be former Daredevil villain, the OWL!

You see, in issue #6, Louise Simonson took over the writing chores on X-Factor, and she preffered to have the mystery villain be a NEW villain to add to the mutant mythos, so Layton, on the way out, was asked to have it changed, and he, being a sporting soul, did so.
Imagine The Age of Owl!!! That would have been awesome!!
(I checked with Layton for confirmation of the story, and he confirmed it).
Well, that's it for this week, thanks for stopping by!
Feel free to drop off any urban legends you'd like to see featured!!
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Which 3/15 Books Did You Have No Snark For?
Which books released this Wednesday did you have no snark for?
I had no snark for the last issue of Seven Soldiers: Bulleteer, which I found to be a very effective final issue.
I also have no snark for Superman #650, Kurt Busiek and Geoff Johns' first issue on the title, with the One Year Later storyline.
I had no snark for the last issue of Seven Soldiers: Bulleteer, which I found to be a very effective final issue.
I also have no snark for Superman #650, Kurt Busiek and Geoff Johns' first issue on the title, with the One Year Later storyline.
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
I'd Have Given Captain Marvel Black Widow's Role in Harras' Avengers
If you reread Bob Harras' Avengers run, you'll notice two things...
1. It wasn't all that powerful of an Avengers team
and
2. Black Widow really doesn't DO much
That's why, I'd have Captain Marvel II take over as Avengers chairperson during Widow's tenure.
I do not think it would change any of Harras' stories, really, and all it would do would be give Captain Marvel II some much-needed exposure.
Well, THAT'S it for the I'ds of March!
I hope you enjoyed them!
1. It wasn't all that powerful of an Avengers team
and
2. Black Widow really doesn't DO much
That's why, I'd have Captain Marvel II take over as Avengers chairperson during Widow's tenure.
I do not think it would change any of Harras' stories, really, and all it would do would be give Captain Marvel II some much-needed exposure.
Well, THAT'S it for the I'ds of March!
I hope you enjoyed them!
Feel Free To Share YOUR "I'd"s Here!!
Use this space to use up YOUR I'ds!!
What would YOU'D have done differently in comics?
What would YOU'D have done differently in comics?
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
I'd Keep Ben Reilly Alive
I don't think there was anything WRONG with Ben Reilly.
He was a decent character, he was just unfortunately the sign of a bad era in Spider-Man comics.
Still, I don't see what would have been the harm to just have someone definitively prove Ben is the clone, and then let Ben walk off into the sunset, to show up every once in awhile, and maybe die at some OTHER point in time.
He was a decent character, he was just unfortunately the sign of a bad era in Spider-Man comics.
Still, I don't see what would have been the harm to just have someone definitively prove Ben is the clone, and then let Ben walk off into the sunset, to show up every once in awhile, and maybe die at some OTHER point in time.
Monday, March 13, 2006
I'd Not Have Had Jefferson Pierce Belong to Luthor's Cabinet
Not to pick on the Luthor presidency too much, but really, Black Lightning was an extremely weird choice to be a Secretary in the Cabinet.
The guy was a normal schoolteacher!
Not only that, but even if he DID have the qualifications, I do not think that he would ever actually WANT to work for Luthor!
I'd have kept him out of the Cabinet, or at least make it clear that he was spying on Luthor.
The guy was a normal schoolteacher!
Not only that, but even if he DID have the qualifications, I do not think that he would ever actually WANT to work for Luthor!
I'd have kept him out of the Cabinet, or at least make it clear that he was spying on Luthor.
Sunday, March 12, 2006
I'd Have Kept Dox and Stealth as a Couple
Please note that, since Stealth has not appeared since REBELS ended, she might very well still BE with Vril Dox, but, just to make sure, let me point out that I'd like to see her with Dox.
Their relationship in REBELS was a fine piece of work by Tom Peyer, as Stealth slowly realizes that she actually CARES for Vril Dox, something that, as you imagine, comes as quite a shock to Stealth!
Dox, meanwhile, can't help but be his usual self with her, so to see them involved together would be a total mess of character interaction and hilarity.
I'd love to see it happen someday.
A twisted outer space Moonlighting.
Who wouldn't like that?
Their relationship in REBELS was a fine piece of work by Tom Peyer, as Stealth slowly realizes that she actually CARES for Vril Dox, something that, as you imagine, comes as quite a shock to Stealth!
Dox, meanwhile, can't help but be his usual self with her, so to see them involved together would be a total mess of character interaction and hilarity.
I'd love to see it happen someday.
A twisted outer space Moonlighting.
Who wouldn't like that?
Saturday, March 11, 2006
I'd Have Kept Hardback Bock in the Bat-Books
One of the things that has always puzzled me was the decision to promote Hardback Bock OUT of the Bat-Books, and then replace him with Crispus Allen, who, while a good character himself, really did not present much more, character-wise, than Bock ever did.
Bock was a good character, and a nice tie to the "before No Man's Land" Gotham, and a man who managed to get THROUGH No Man's Land...and his reward is character limbo?
I think Bock deserved better, I think he deserved a role in Gotham Central.
Bock was a good character, and a nice tie to the "before No Man's Land" Gotham, and a man who managed to get THROUGH No Man's Land...and his reward is character limbo?
I think Bock deserved better, I think he deserved a role in Gotham Central.
Friday, March 10, 2006
I'd Have Kept Hawkeye Single
I enjoyed Mockingird.
I did.
I thought she was a neat character, and I liked her interaction with Hawkeye.
However, I also think that, as soon as Hawkeye and Mockingbird got together, that it created a bit of a tug upon Hawkeye, forcing him to become more and more serious, and more straight-laced.
And I think making Hawkeye mature was more of a decision made for the writers, who liked to see him develop as a character, not made in the best interests of the character.
And as a result of Hawkeye's marriage to Mockingbird, writers who WANTED a return to the Hawkeye of old had no other recourse than to get rid of Mockingbird, which is a shame, as she was a neat character.
I did.
I thought she was a neat character, and I liked her interaction with Hawkeye.
However, I also think that, as soon as Hawkeye and Mockingbird got together, that it created a bit of a tug upon Hawkeye, forcing him to become more and more serious, and more straight-laced.
And I think making Hawkeye mature was more of a decision made for the writers, who liked to see him develop as a character, not made in the best interests of the character.
And as a result of Hawkeye's marriage to Mockingbird, writers who WANTED a return to the Hawkeye of old had no other recourse than to get rid of Mockingbird, which is a shame, as she was a neat character.
Thursday, March 09, 2006
I'd Have Not Made D-Man a Loony
I think that D-Man was a fairly noble superhero who had some enjoyable stories during Mark Gruenwald's Captain America run.
I do not think he would have made a very good Avenger, but I enjoyed the fact that Captain America asked him.
Later on, I thought it was interesting to see him become a hero for the homeless (although I did not like the way it was played for laughs in early issues of Avengers Volume 3).
Therefore, I think there is enough interesting stories in the idea of a superhero for the homeless that I would not have made D-Man, well, nuts, as he was recently in an issue of Daredevil.
I do not think he would have made a very good Avenger, but I enjoyed the fact that Captain America asked him.
Later on, I thought it was interesting to see him become a hero for the homeless (although I did not like the way it was played for laughs in early issues of Avengers Volume 3).
Therefore, I think there is enough interesting stories in the idea of a superhero for the homeless that I would not have made D-Man, well, nuts, as he was recently in an issue of Daredevil.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
I'd Have Kept Ultimate Beast Alive
I understand the concept of killing off a character to
A. Let the readers know there is some danger involved here
and
B. Let the readers know that being alive in the regular continuity will not protect you in the Ultimate line
but Beast's death in Ultimate X-Men was just too lackluster, too much of an afterthought, and also, Beast had such an impact upon the X-Men stories to that point that I think his death really took a lot out of the book - stuff that I do not think has been replaced since his death.
A. Let the readers know there is some danger involved here
and
B. Let the readers know that being alive in the regular continuity will not protect you in the Ultimate line
but Beast's death in Ultimate X-Men was just too lackluster, too much of an afterthought, and also, Beast had such an impact upon the X-Men stories to that point that I think his death really took a lot out of the book - stuff that I do not think has been replaced since his death.
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
I'd Have a Human Hero Join the X-Men
Wouldn't that be a neat message about "everyone being equal," if a homo sapien hero joined the X-Men?
I think so, and that's what I would do (yes, there have been human heroes in the past, as recently as Juggernaut, but none NOW!).
I think so, and that's what I would do (yes, there have been human heroes in the past, as recently as Juggernaut, but none NOW!).
Monday, March 06, 2006
I'd Not Have Pete Ross Be Vice-President
I'd not have had Pete Ross be Lex Luthor's running mate, for the following reasons:
1. Pete was a fill-in Senator, which would not make him a very good running mate, politically?
2. Pete almost KILLED a dude, when he was being controlled by the Sons of Liberty.
and
3. Having Pete Ross eligible for the Presidency would make him, and Clark, 35 years old, which I think is a bit too old for Superman.
1. Pete was a fill-in Senator, which would not make him a very good running mate, politically?
2. Pete almost KILLED a dude, when he was being controlled by the Sons of Liberty.
and
3. Having Pete Ross eligible for the Presidency would make him, and Clark, 35 years old, which I think is a bit too old for Superman.
Sunday, March 05, 2006
I'd Have Followed Len Wein's Advice on the Ending of Watchmen
Len Wein has always stated that he did not like the ending of the Watchmen series, and I am inclined to agree with him.
As Wein mentions, the whole series was so original, so inventive, so to have an ending that was VERY similar (i.e. the same) as an ending to an Outer Limits TV show probably was not a good idea.
So I'd have followed Len Wein's advice and changed it to something - anything.
As Wein mentions, the whole series was so original, so inventive, so to have an ending that was VERY similar (i.e. the same) as an ending to an Outer Limits TV show probably was not a good idea.
So I'd have followed Len Wein's advice and changed it to something - anything.
Saturday, March 04, 2006
I'd Not Have Had Donna Troy Get Married and Pregnant
For a company that has not had its characters age much in sixty years, DC sure seems to sometimes want to go that way, doesn't it?
One of those problems, I think, was in the idea of aging Donna Troy. I do not think it worked with the rest of the members of the Teen Titans.
If Donna Troy is getting married and having a kid, doesn't that basically age the Titans as well?
I'd have kept her single.
One of those problems, I think, was in the idea of aging Donna Troy. I do not think it worked with the rest of the members of the Teen Titans.
If Donna Troy is getting married and having a kid, doesn't that basically age the Titans as well?
I'd have kept her single.
Friday, March 03, 2006
I'd Have Kept the International Part of the Justice League
I never really got the problem some writers had with the concept of the Justice League working with the United Nations.
I mean, yeah, there might be some bureacracy, but not the way that some of these comic writers seemed to make it out to be.
And a nice function of the United Nations relationship is that it allowed characters like Maxwell Lord and Catherine Cobert to have an actual FUNCTION, ya know?
That was another thing I never got, the anger people had towards characters like Lord and Cobert. I thought they were interesting characters.
I mean, yeah, there might be some bureacracy, but not the way that some of these comic writers seemed to make it out to be.
And a nice function of the United Nations relationship is that it allowed characters like Maxwell Lord and Catherine Cobert to have an actual FUNCTION, ya know?
That was another thing I never got, the anger people had towards characters like Lord and Cobert. I thought they were interesting characters.
Thursday, March 02, 2006
I'd Make Storm An Avenger
While I think it was probably a bit of crass marketing that put Storm on to the Marvel Adventures team, I think, in the regular Marvel Universe, that Storm would work really well as a member of the Avengers.
Think about it - she's already famous enough, popularity-wise, but story-wise, I think she MAY have reached the end of her rope in the X-Men. She needs to be somewhere where she can let herself go a bit, and I think the Avengers is just that place.
Think about it - she's already famous enough, popularity-wise, but story-wise, I think she MAY have reached the end of her rope in the X-Men. She needs to be somewhere where she can let herself go a bit, and I think the Avengers is just that place.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
I'd Have Brought Black Thorn Into the Bat-Books
Nunzio DeFillipis was planning a comic book, for a time, at DC where he would bring a bunch of different street-level vigilantes into Gotham City as a team.
One of his team members was Black Thorn.
I agree with him, I'd have brought Black Thorn into the Bat-Books myself. She fits right in, doesn't she?

I'd at least bring her back in SOME book!
Maybe Checkmate?
One of his team members was Black Thorn.
I agree with him, I'd have brought Black Thorn into the Bat-Books myself. She fits right in, doesn't she?
I'd at least bring her back in SOME book!
Maybe Checkmate?
The I'ds of March!!
New shtick!!
For the next fifteen days, I'll tell you things that I'd have done in certain comics!!
But don't worry, I'm not talking about simple 20/20 hindsight things like pick a famous bad storyline and just say, "I wouldn't have done that."
No, I mean more like tweaks and nudges, stuff like that.
You'll see what I mean in a sec....
For the next fifteen days, I'll tell you things that I'd have done in certain comics!!
But don't worry, I'm not talking about simple 20/20 hindsight things like pick a famous bad storyline and just say, "I wouldn't have done that."
No, I mean more like tweaks and nudges, stuff like that.
You'll see what I mean in a sec....